I broke up with my ex of 7 years because of several incidents of online cheating and seeking sexual validation outside of the relationship. It’s been a long road, but I finally feel at peace. At first I was worried because I only associated sex and romance with her, and wasn’t able to get there with other women, but now I feel nothing for her either.
I just don’t feel sex and relationships are worth the effort, and risks of getting emotionally attached to someone. I took my breakup really hard, and nothing is worth going through that again. I still watch porn occasionally, but I don’t feel any desire to pursue the women that show interest in me. My life is peaceful for the first time ever, and other than the rare longing to speak to my ex again, I don’t feel any emotional turmoil. On a scale of 1 to 10s, my happiness is consistently a 7 or so now. Sure in my relationship I got a few 10/10 days but I also got a lot of 1/10 days, and I don’t think it’s with it. It almost feels as if I’m asexual now, but I’m doubting asexuals watch porn.
Tl;dr: have no desire to get to know women romantically after breakup
4 comments
You’re in a phase right now. Give yourself sometime and you’ll be back on track
The thing is, if you choose the right woman and don’t tolerate her causing 1/10 days, then you’ll soon find most days to be well above your current 7. Even the risk of choosing poorly and having some bad dates will soon be made up for when you have more of those 10/10 days with someone else.
I’m still getting through it as well man. You are not over her yet and are still trying to peace things together. I broke up with my ex gf/fiance of 6 years last May and I STILL just don’t have it in me to get into another relationship, even if I want to. You are going through something that’s completely normal, even if it’s confusing and miserable.
Use this time to focus on yourself, don’t focus on relationships until you get back to your complete usual self. Get shredded, be super ambitious and for what you desire. Be a little selfish ya know, but not a dick of course lol. You’ve gone through the wringer and deserve some you time.
I’ve been working out daily, and have been recently really getting back into my career field and just doing what I can. Thinking about going to get my masters.
I believe you can get through this! Love yourself and give yourself the time you need, do NOT throw yourself into another relationship if you don’t think you can handle it. I literally tried and had a panic attack because I realized I was mentally over my head. 😅
You’ve got this. You’ll make it.
I would suggest you something as a brother…
Carry on with your professional life and build your career, one day you will meet your best match as God has a better plan for you….
Just don’t think of it…