My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 7 years (since we were in middle school). Of course things haven’t been perfect, but overall I feel like we’ve had a happy relationship! I think we are both good communicators, we’ve been through a lot together, and we’ve felt serious about about each other for a long time. I am a year older than him, so we did a year of long-distance (about an hour and a half away) during his senior year of HS/my first year of college. He came to the same university as me so that we could be together and we ended up moving in to an apartment together over the summer (again, we have felt serious about each other for a long time and felt like this was the right step for us). We are now in our second and third years of college, respectively.
Admittedly, his mental health has not been great since starting college. He’s been struggling with anxiety/depression and has not really branched out much since starting college (hasn’t really made any friends of his own or joined any orgs, etc). I \*do\* have my own group of friends, and I stay pretty busy with my orgs and my studies. I totally understand how overwhelming starting college can be (we go to a very big university), but he hasn’t made much effort to improve his situation. He pretty consistently feels insecure/dreads being in class most of the time.
Of course this is discouraging because I want him to be happy above all else, but I feel like it impacts our relationship. We have had several discussions about how I’ve been feeling unloved and unhappy and it just seems like nothing really gets resolved. I feel like I put more in to the relationship than I get out and I’ve been contemplating on whether or not we really have a future together.
He saw a psychiatrist and started taking anxiety medication a couple weeks ago and I think he has been improving, but I still haven’t been able to shake these feelings I’ve been having. It just feels like there’s not much love anymore. I’ve been thinking about what it would be like to be with someone else and it usually just feels like we’re roommates more than partners.Again, we’ve been through a lot together and have started planning our futures together. I don’t want to let a rough patch ruin a good thing, but I sometimes I worry that maybe I’m holding on to something that isn’t meant to be. It’s really hard to imagine a life where we \*arne’t\* together, but it’s also hard to ignore this drift I’ve been feeling. Can it be fixed?
Any advice is appreciated <3
tl;dr I’m feeling unsure about my long-term relationship. I feel like the love isn’t there but I can’t tell if it’s a rough patch or if it’s time to move on.