I broke up from my one year relationship because I realized he was never truly loving me the way I needed to be loved. I was in constant worry of him cheating (cause he had) and he was always so severe with his phone.
We ended up living together really early on and I did lose my virginity to him which was important to me at the time.
Anyways I left cause I saw something else he did and it was the final straw for me.
I catch myself texting him a lot and stuff when I shouldn’t.
I unblocked him on everything cause we are not really with bad blood.
We both still love eachother but we have our own things we have to work on and we were not good together.
Anytime I hear a song that we used to listen to together, see couples in public, or just overall think about him, I get physically sick where I want to throw up. I do miss him. A lot. He was more first ever everything and this is so hard.
He is also having a hard time.
I wondered if us still keeping communication every now and then can help instead of just going cold turkey like we did until we just stop really communicating?
I’ve been hanging out with friends a lot… but even then I can’t stop thinking of him. It’s frustrating.
We have so many memories together and vacations and just so many things we’ve done together it’s hard. Plus he was there through a really hard mental thing I went through and ugh… yeah. That’s it. I’m sure I made a good choice, but dang it’s so hard.