Hey guys!
I’ve been suffering with the „gras is always greener on the other side“ for most of my life. I had a really wild time in my twenties and I was really into the „picking up women makes you a real cool big boy“, especially because I always wanted to be „good at something“ and I was „good“ at that.
I also had a few relationships (which also lasted a few years) and they always had the pattern, that I first was really into my gf, sexually and after a few months my desire for sex went to a minimum. Also I pretty much started to be attracted to the opposite of my gf, like for example if she was tall, slim and blonde, I always wanted someone small and petite with black hair and vice versa. Also I always start to question if I am still attracted to my GF. But in the past, always when I was positive I was not attracted to my SO anymore and I left her (because nobody deserves a partner who thinks about the like this)
And few months later, when I saw an EX again I was really attracted to them again.
But while in the relationship I always eally convince myself that my partner is not attractive.
So I know it’s a me-issue and I really want to do something against it. I really love my gf and I neither want to think about her like this nor does she deserve someone who has this thoughts. I also thought maybe leaving, because she deserves better but I tried that experiment in the past and always regretted it.
Any thoughts?
TLDR:
I seem to always want the opposite of my SO when it comes to looks and I don’t know how to change that.