I’m 41, and I find myself in a circumstance I can’t seem to figure out. I want to make a concerted effort to meet new people, make friends, maybe find dates or even a relationship. Basically, to get the most out of trying.
A lot of the meetup groups, singles groups and even events like Skip The Small Talk in my nearest city (Boston) are for college aged people or people in their 20s/30s. Especially the dating ones cut off at 35.
I’m sure there are meetup groups for people 40+, but the thing is, I can’t relate to people my age. For context, I’ve never been in a relationship. Many people my age who are trying to do the same as myself and meet people, have families, kids in grade school, parenting stresses, career stresses.
Women my age (on the dating sections) are divorced, have children already, and are looking to find someone. But I have less dating experience than their kids in many cases. How am I supposed to relate to them?
What I’m getting at is, the birthdate on my driver’s license says 1982, but in terms of social growth and maturity and sense of fun, I’m still in my 20s. Or is that a fallacy? Perhaps I have Peter Pan syndrome. I go to games, city events, concerts, club shows, on my own just fine. But I have that luxury since I’m single and a loner I suppose.
Sorry this is all over the place. I’m starting to realize that if I don’t find something, it may be too late to find a group of friends that I didn’t try to find in my teens, 20s and 30s. Or that I waited too long to try to date because it doesn’t look like I’ll ever settle or have kids of my own, because I was irresponsible with my time. That’s its own kind of grief.
I refuse to lie about my age. But I also feel that my age shuts me out of the things I should have done when I was younger, but I didn’t, and now I have no idea what to do.