My boyfriend (28M) was always so proud of his ability to make me cum multiple, *multiple* times. I even lightly lost consciousness a few times from busting my ovaries so hard. But over time, I just can’t seem to cum from penetration anymore.
For context, I was on Nexplanon for the first 3.5 years of our relationship. It’s was amazing at first, I liked the peace of mind knowing it was near impossible for me to get pregnant. But after the first year, my sex drive was almost nonexistent and I could barely get wet enough for penetration. I kind of developed a weird kink for dry, painful sex as a result. (Don’t worry, he never coerced me into sex, it was all my choice to try to have dry sex).
In November 2022, I got my Nexplanon removed and the copper IUD inserted. Not having hormonal birth control has been magical and I feel alive again. I’ve speculated on my sex life over the last year and a half though, and I’ve noticed a couple things.
1. My boyfriend had accepted and respected my low libido while I had Nexplanon, and I think he (who used to have an insatiable sex drive) coped himself into not throwing himself at me as much as he probably wanted to. Now he doesn’t seem as voracious or as full of desire for me as he used to be, like that mindset of not initiating out of respect for my low libido still hangs on. When we managed to fuck, I did cum most times all up until I got my Nexplanon removed.
2. I get so wet now. Ridiculously wet. With Nexplanon, I neve got wet enough, but now I feel like a teenager again. As a result, there’s little to no friction and because of that dry kink I picked up, I feel like there’s almost less sensation during sex.
3. On Nexplanon, my goal was only ever to make sure my boyfriend came because even though I enjoyed it, it would straight up only hurt eventually, and he refused to continue when I was in pain. But now part of me still subconsciously views sex as “make him cum no matter what”. Even though he tries to make me cum I just never feel like I’m getting close enough because I’m too focused on him.
I just don’t know how to cum *specifically* from vaginal penetration anymore. It’s frustrating and sad for both of us. Makes me feel old too, lol. Any advice?