What is the story behind your last friendship heartbreak?

6 comments

1. oh, no thank you. i don’t feel like having to stitch myself up again later on tonight.

2. I don’t want to play this game. I’ll take the dare. 🥺

3. she was super toxic and a bully, but also really funny and could make me feel special and like it was me&her vs the world. finally had to cut contact once i realized she just made me nervous and anxious.

4. My best friend was very “anti” Covid. She’s an anti masker, anti restrictions, believes it’s all fake and about government control. I caught Covid in the spring of 2021, and got incredibly sick. Bedridden, hospital trips, double lung pneumonia, long term damage – you get the idea. She texted me once when I’d only been sick for a few days and tried to convince me that it wasn’t that bad, and I couldn’t possibly be as sick as what I was. (I’m in my 30’s and a personal trainer) She didn’t want to believe it. She never checked in on me again. I haven’t been able to get over it. I tried, I thought I could move on but I’m honestly so hurt. I know I need to sit her down and tell her how much that hurt me, but I’m scared of making myself that vulnerable and for her to gaslight or make excuses. So I’ve just avoided her for most of the last year.

5. I had a friend and we had a two piece band playing folk and Irish. We were doing ok. Then he died suddenly from a previously undiagnosed condition. That was last year and I’m not over it yet.

6. I had a friend who I expected to be friends with life. We met Freshman year of HS. There were some red flags the first year or so – she would say she could do something and cancel on me last minute because a family thing had come up, etc. It happened often enough that I began to think she just didn’t want to be friends with me and was trying to get me to give up on asking her to do things instead of just telling me. Before I could confront her about it, things got better and we started hanging out more. I brushed the rocky beginning off as genuine bad timing.

   We could talk to each other about anything. I’ve never clicked so well with a person. By junior year I considered her one of my best friends. Like, someone I could see being the maid of honor at my wedding.
   She gave me a really nice card at graduation talking about how grateful she was to have formed such a wonderful friendship and how she wanted it to last the rest of our lives. We video chatted almost every month freshmen year of college and texted each other often.

   Over the summers, she went to her lake house and cell reception there was poor. It was common to go long periods without being able to get ahold of her. One night over the summer before year 2 of college, we tried to arrange a video chat. The last message I received was her telling me service was bad and to try calling her over Snapchat. It didn’t work.

   Radio silence for almost 3 months. I missed her a lot and sent messages every now and then, got nothing.
   I wrote a hand written letter pouring my heart out to her that I planned to send to her home address as a last ditch effort. Another close friend of mine was aquatinted with one of her friends and offered to ask that person if they’d heard from her. Turns out, she was doing just fine and keeping in contact with other people, just not me. I hit a breaking point and sent pictures of my letter to her. I then laid it all out on the table and told her I knew she had to be getting my messages and how betrayed I felt.

   She responded several days later. I fully expected an apology, an explanation, and an offer to make it up to me. Instead, it was basically, “yeah, you’re right. I shouldn’t have done that. I’ve been a bad friend. You deserve better. Have a nice life.”

   Looking back, I probably should have left it at that, but I was so invested in our friendship that it hurt to imagine life without her in it. I wanted to at least talk face to face. I eventually got her to video chat with me to try and talk things out. We made up and formed a tentative bond again. She told me she appreciated talking it out and promised to try harder. We exchanged a few more texts over the next month or so, all friendly. Then silence again, this time for good.

   That was about a year and a half ago. She blocked me on instagram, as far as I can tell, so I have no way of knowing what she’s up to. It still hurts and will probably go some degree bother me for the rest of my life.

   TLDR: flaker who never gave me closure