I (31M) would have never used “suppressed” about my sexuality but I think that is what it is.
I think over the years on the internet I got seared in my mind that “men only see women as sex objects”. I have a pattern of behavior that I immortalize the opposite of a negative stereotype that could be associated with my “group” hence the issue.
Another common thing that I think I “suffer” is that sex feels like it is something that I am doing to someone rather than a shared experience. (I blame my first relationship where it was mostly this).
It is not that I am not attracted to a female body. I **love** it, all the shapes and curves. It is just that when it comes to reality it is not the body but a person in front of me and I am not allowing myself to see the body as something to be excited about.
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I have settled in that it is just the way I have it and I mostly lost hope that it will change but I thought that I would ask if someone has/had something similar and any possible tips on how to get rid of “it”.