Yikes, please don’t judge my question!! I am too embarrassed to ask any of my friends what they think.
I f(25) have been with my bf (27) for almost 5 years. Our sex life is usually great. He is very ‘giving’ during oral lol. But we just got in a huge fight tonight. We were in missionary and all was swell but I wanted it rougher(as I usually do) so I said “fuck me harder” (I was still into it when I asked him, I didn’t sound mean or rude), and he snapped at me to stop asking him that. He says I’m too demanding and “make him feel like a horse” whenever I ask him to thrust differently. Then he told me that if I want to be fucked harder to get on top and do it myself. I like being on top alright, but sometimes I want him to take control and go harder. We stopped after that and got into a fight. He has told me not to ask him for that before, but I’ve always moved on without addressing it. But honestly, sometimes he is too gentle or slow, which doesn’t satisfy me. I don’t think asking for what I want is too much. It’s starting to become a bigger problem. I explained to him that I was only asking for what I wanted and was not trying to be rude or hurt his feelings. All he said after that was that we should take a break from having sex.
I really love this man, our relationship is amazing outside of this so breaking up isn’t an option.
Am I in the wrong? Any tips on how to navigate this respectfully are much appreciated.