So I’m friends with my coworker and we made plans over a month ago (kept rescheduling) to go to this spa/bathhouse for the day, I’ve been really looking forward to it because I want to unwind and spend 1 on 1 with her. Yesterday she tells me, “Oh I invited xyz, (let’s call her Anna) hope that’s okay.” And I just nod, and I’m annoyed. I find Anna annoying. She’s nice but literally laughs at the end of every sentence, literally. every. sentence. Like I could ask how are you? and she’ll go \*giggles\* “I’m goood! \*giggles\* she giggles at every fucking thing. And I’m not a grouch, I am a fun bubbly person but I find it exhausting to be around people like that and I’m not close to her, and sometimes I pick up a bit of an attitude from her too? (might be projecting).
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When I make plans, I have already envisioned how it would go, what things I’d talk about and who I’m spending that time with. I don’t have the energy for a group hang and now the dynamics will be different and I can’t talk about a lot of things I wanted to, and I’ll have to expand more energy to mask and keep up with this new dynamic. Also when they’re together since they’re closer they exclude me from conversations which happens at work. Also, Anna invited my friend out to drinks for her birthday like two nights ago, and I wasn’t invited to that so I find it extra rude then you invite her to our plans? Idk it just annoys me. I honestly want to cancel and just go alone, or how do I explain i wanted this to be a just us thing, which I don’t think I can say, because what is friend A supposed to say to Anna? “Oh you can’t come now since \_\_ doesn’t want you to” !? Just annoying and inconsiderate. That will make work awkward too.
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(for the record I’m like basically 50/50 on extroversion/introversion when I took that meyers briggs quiz lol I’m INFP-T if that has any relevancy.) I love hanging out with people, groups, party settings, but I also have a strong need for quiet slow intimate settings too.
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(I feel annoyed I’m even spending energy on this but feel the need to rant/ ask for advice about it)