I(18M) have been on and off with this girl(18M) since our junior year in hs. Our highs are really high and our lows are really low. In November ‘23, she came to a party I invited her to and me and her hung out for the first time since we had decided to not talk to each other at the beginning of our freshman year in college(august ‘23) bc she felt that it was time to go down different paths. At the party we both got drunk and I kissed her and I told her I loved her and she seemed fine with it then, and I asked her why we arent together. I did all this and said all this only bc the day before i found out from one of her friends that she still used to talk abt me and told everyone that i was the best she ever had and treated her better than anyone else but she was afraid of commitment because her parents relationship was in a bad place for most of her life and she didnt want that to be the case with her. So, when I asked her why we arent together she told me that it was bc of her parents relationship and how they turned out, but I made my case and told her I would never treat her like that and that she means the world to me and then we both fell asleep. Next morning, she seemed okay but ever since then we havent talked. I texted her asking her if she was okay, and tried to reach out to her. I asked her bestfriend why she wouldnt talk to me and her bestfriend said there was nothing between us to begin with and that now she is trying to focus on herself. Btw, the bestfriend is known to be toxic and fake so Im not really sure how much truth there is to her bc the night of the party she kept telling me to make a move and bring us together. Anyhow, we havent talked since that day and so I tried reaching out to her with a simple hey a couple days ago and got no response. I am not sure how to bring us back in touch with each other or fix things bc I do genuinely love her and I know she still most probably thinks abt us. For reference we go to different colleges so randomly catching her in-person is not sum I can do till the summer prolly. Any advice or tips? Thank you for reading through all this!
TL;DR: I am trying to talk to someone who I have been on and off with for a long time and recently that hasnt worked because of past complications related to family trauma and lack of trust in relationships. Whats the best move?