Long story short I started dating in August of last year.
The first time before our first date he let me know he had a BDSM kink and explained it, I knew what BDSM was. I’ve been curious about it but never fully done it.
So I was kinda excited to try, throughout us dating his story regarding women he’s dated and BDSM has changed. From saying he had two girls who was strictly BDSM, to saying just one but over 10 years ago.
A big thing that’s new to me is anal, he’s OBSESSED with it in our dynamic. He said at first he tried to try it with his longterm ex gf but she wasn’t into it and I was his new experience. I did not believe this whatsoever, and I let him know that because
1. He had a lot of anal toys (he claims he ordered them when I showed interest in BDSM)
2. He seems more skilled in prepping and the beginning stages of it.
3. He always wants to do it.
I’ve tried letting him know I won’t be upset if he lied about his experience with anal to make me feel like it’s something new we are both experiencing but he said no I’m his first.
Lately we’ve been talking more about getting engaged and living together. I’ve been down this path with my ex and when we lived together for awhile more and more things didn’t make sense till one day I snooped in his closet and found out A LOT. 3 years wasted.
So my gut told me to do the same thing with my current bf (I know bad) I found a black duffle bag. It consist of a huge ass purpose dildo, this anal hook, this heavy weight huge anal plug, chains, screws, leather, mouth gag, rope, this thing used to keep the anus open, things labelled “big bed” & “small bed” etc etc etc. Shocker, they’re all clearly USED. Like they clearly were used, they still had bits lube on it and other stuff..
I’m not sure how to let him know I saw this which means like I suspected he’s clearly experienced in BDSM. He’s clearly done it before a lot more advance than we have been doing cause one of the plugs was metal with weights inside it and an anal hook.