To start of with I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years now and it’s the exact same as it was at the start of the relationship. I feel he essentially holds me back a lot and the way he treats me has a knock on effect on the all the other aspects of my life.
He is a problem gambler and I told his family as they already had their suspicions and were worried about him as he is always depressed as he never has any money. Any time we’re out together he leaves me to go drink and sniff with his friends and I have to chase him around and eventually end up going home by myself and wake up to a sorry text at 1:00pm the next day.
The straw on the camels back for me was probably Friday night. I came to a realisation things may never change with him or us. He promised me he would take me out as I had stood by him the last couple months through his trauma and I had a gut feeling he wouldn’t.
I kept calling him when I was ready to tell him that I was close to town (where I was meeting him) he kept putting the phone down on me and ignoring me so I knew he was sniffing and drinking as at this point he had been finished from work since 2.00pm as he had an early and had met his friends. I got to the bar where he was and he was so drunk and out of it to the point where I knew he couldn’t eat.
I begged him to leave to go to the restaurant and he was refusing saying that we should drink there instead. I begged and begged and he eventually came. We got to the restaurant and he was saying that his phone was dead and he didn’t know how he would pay for it. I said that I didn’t want to eat if he wasn’t sure it could be paid for and we left and he made us go back to the bar where his friends were. I was crying my eyes out because I felt like I deserve better.
He has been apologising all weekend but this is not the 1st time or even 20th time something like this has happened. Some people tell me he will change and I should stick around but I also feel like I’m waisting my time.
I feel at a loss and like I’m carrying his trauma for him and don’t know what to do anymore?
TL;DR – my boyfriend never treats me, always abondones me and treats me like a second option and has a gambling addiction.