I realized I was bisexual in October and started really paying attention to certain things I never think twice about. I came to the realization that I usually don’t get turned on when my husband initiates sex. I like when he kisses my neck and stuff, it’s nice. But it doesn’t get me all tingly down there. But if I start initiating after he stops trying, it turns me on. Like I love seeing how his body reacts and how he looks like he wants it. That turns me on. Is that normal? PS I’m a cis woman.
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I don’t know how the two things are related but yes it’s normal to get turned on by turning someone else on. That’s exactly what he’s trying to do.
Sounds normal enough. I think it’s common to have very specific triggers/turn-ons/turn-offs. Of course we want to KNOW our partner desires us, so seeing and feeling that desire us a powerful aphrodisiac. If I feel like my wife isn’t really into it, I basically can’t function. So you sound completely normal to me.
I strongly recommend reading Emily Nagoski’s “Come As You Are”. It might help understanding your sexual response.