The easiest way to do this has been creating a physical distance.
But my mother is entering that stage in life where she needs care. A third party organization is not an option for financial reasons, so family is the answer we’ve arrived to.
Long story short, there is a possibility I may be the only one to take care of her but our relationship is too difficult. She triggers me all the time. A laundry list of things. And even though she brings up complicated feelings in me, I love her, she is my mom. I want no regrets when she passes away one day. But I also need to protect myself from her traumatizing antics.
I want to be compassionate because ai know change is hard for anybody, but loving someone through their struggles and abuse with no reciprocity just depletes me. And I say reciprocity because I am no saint and at the very least I need an I love you or a thank you because it all really wears me down.
How do you set boundaries or just love someone even more in such a situation?