I (F24) have been married to my husband (M30) for two years now and together for a total of seven years. Everything was fine up until we got married. He started asking me to sleep with other men, fall in love with another man, and say other men’s names during sex. I always told him no, but the harassment became too much and I decided to do what he asked and slept with another man (that he picked out). As soon as it was over, he started crying asking me how I could have done this to him. The very next day, he asked me to do it again.
I take full accountability for my actions and agreeing to it, but ever since then, our marriage was just never the same. I can’t hang out with friends without him accusing me of cheating. There have been a few times where I told him where I was and he followed me there to make sure I wasn’t cheating. Just for him to ask me to cheat on him again anyway?? I feel so numb.
I asked him to go to therapy, and he started to go but now he just calls himself a sex addict. Whenever he brings up cuckolding he just says “That obviously isn’t me”.
Anyway, We have been separated since November. I told him recently that I just don’t feel as if I love him anymore, and he decided to file for divorce the very next day. Every other day, he’s either calling me a “stupid bitch” or he’s bawling his eyes out asking to make this marriage work. He even texted me yesterday saying, “What do you want?” but he’s the one who filed for this divorce. He keeps telling me he will cancel this divorce if I just tell him what I want… but I don’t know what I want nor did I file for this divorce in the first place.
I’m lost. I’m not sure what to do. Should I try couples therapy and try to save this?