Sorry for the long post!
Hello all, looking for the best way to respond. I (23M) met this girl (20F) in a bar at the end of March. We have been on about a dozen dates and I personally thought that they all went great.
We were supposed to be meeting up again tomorrow but unfortunately she text me last night saying that she would be busy and unable to stick to the plan. I told her this was no issue and asked her what her schedule was looking like for the rest of the week. This is when she replied to me saying that she had had some great times with me but she wasn’t looking for a relationship right now and that she only wanted something platonic.
This kinda set me back quite a bit and I won’t lie it did upset me, I thought things had been going great and there had been nothing to suggest otherwise from her. We had been intimate and also said that we weren’t talking to/dating anyone else.
She text me this morning as I haven’t replied to her yet, asking if I was ok. I am unsure of what to say apart from that I am not interested in a platonic relationship/friendship as I am still very attracted to her.
If anyone has been in this situation before, what would be a polite way to reply?
Thanks in advance!
5 comments
Don’t respond, just move on
What you said was fine. I’m sorry, I’m not interested in something platonic. It would be best if I moved on.
Chicks sometimes suck man. She’s not into you. Hurts to hear but you have to just move on and try not to contact her anymore.
You don’t have to give an explanation, but sometimes a person doesn’t understand that some people are unable to switch to a platonic relationship after sharing intimacy. It sounds like this girl is one of those people who doesn’t understand. Obviously I don’t know the whole situation, but maybe she’s not an awful person and she really just doesn’t feel like being intimate with you right now (or ever) but still values your friendship.
However, if you can’t have friendship after you’ve crossed the line into intimacy, you are in no way obligated to try and make her feel better by saying you can still try and be friends.
You don’t want to be friends. Fine.
“No thanks, but I had a nice time too.”