Hi guys, Im in a spot ive never been in ever before.
I am a 24yo man, with my current gf for 1,5y and… everything works perfectly. I love her, her family, we got plans for the future, we moved in together last september.
Lets call her M.
I met M the same day I met this other girl, lets call her C. With C there was an instant connection, deep in our souls. Though, C was with another guy, for 4 years. C crushed on me the same way I did back then : she voluntarily avoided me to not threaten her current relationship.
2 months forward, M and I started a relationship. Everything is going well since. She moved 6 months abroad for studies but we were strong and we stayed together.
She allowed me to grow and I allowed her to grow, and it still does.
C, M, a few friends and I are in a theatre troup, so we get to see each other a lot. Its a wonderful group of friends.
But you see it coming. C broke up with her bf a few months from now. Since that, C started to show interest in me, from implicit to more and more direct moves. C and I always hit it off very well, so we always got a great thing going on, friendship-wise. C and M are hitting it off as well. Everything is… great.
Last week-end, at C’s birthday week-end, M left 2 days earlier. Immediately, the moments spent with became more powerful. The connection was just so strong. She ended up saying “We could have had an awesome story together”. Unlike all the other times, where I escaped from my desire towards her, I had to confess that I agreed.
Of course, we ended up in the same bed. We didnt do any kissing or lovemaking. I still consider it cheating. We proceeded to express the crush we had for each other for all these months.
Now, I have to choose.
I don’t know how.
M is reliable and hearty. We have some great adventures coming up.
C is just everything I dreamt of a gf but never even thought I could “deserve” someone like her.
Fuck me.
9 comments
Tell M. This way you won’t have to choose. I think you should be with C and M will probably end it if she knew you cheated.
Cheaters should be together. They’re the only ones who can trust each other
The grass is rarely greener on the other side. You end your great relationship and find that once you move in together that this new one is not as good. Lust is a beautiful thing but rarely lasts forever (edit typo).
The grass isn’t always greener. Sometimes a connection fizzles out. You run the risk of ruining a good thing for the chance that someone new will be better. Honestly your current GF should be breaking up with you since it seems like you aren’t all in on her. If she is as great as you say then she should be with someone who feels the same way she does.
Well, there’s no point in staying with M if your heart is set on C. M doesn’t deserve a relationship where her partner is only with her not to hurt her feelings. You’re already emotionally cheating, so just end it with M. She deserves to be free to find someone who genuinely wants a connection with her and feels about her the way you feel about C.
The same way the come in the door is the same way the leave. Keep that in mind on your first date with C and leave M to find someone who doesn’t even have this thought come to mind, let alone type it into reddit expecting validation on something you already want to to do
The grass is not always greener on the other side.
Leave M cause she deserves that respect.
Not becausr you end up on a bed with C even though you did nothing.
Because you had feelings for C. Confessed your crush etc.
Again, grass is not always greener on the other side. Water your own side dammit.
Is C even down to be with someone like you? Not because she is your “dream” girl or what not.
Because here you are in a relationship with a girl, but you telling another girl your feelings for her, on a bed etc.
If things were so great with M you would not be having these feelings about C. You don’t know what you want. I think you should think hard about how the relationship with M falls short of what you dream of. It’s important to know what you want so you don’t stay in a relationship when it is already over. Like you appear to be doing now, maybe.
Well you cheated on M so come clean and let her make the decision for you since you’re too scared. You and C sound made for each other, but don’t be surprised when it doesn’t last. But it’s pretty obvious that M deserves better
describing C as “but never even though I could ‘deserve’ someone like her” is wild to me. C openly disrespected your relationship with M. it sounds like you should use that sentence to describe M, not fake ass C.