First of all, everyone reading this: I hope you guys and gals having a good day. Know that your opinion will be most appreciated.
Let’s hop in: So I’m a 20 yo boy from Turkey. I used to live in a small town and lived there until my late 17’s but I didn’t date anyone there because in that small town nobody was to my liking and then I my family moved to our capital and then I saw a dude on Twitter who was to my liking. Unfortunately he was living in another city in Turkey but I gave it a shot you know; I literally ignored the fact because I was attracted to someone in my 18 years of life. Anyways I started texting him, doing little talk, sending him memes… Keeping him amused. Eventually my work paid off and we started talking on daily basis. Our little daily talk evolved into constant talks you know we were talking day and night without giving a break. And then one night in our long night phone sessions he romantically said he wanted me to visit him. I immediately took action you know because I could lose him or he may think I’m just playing and not actually interested. So I got a bus ticket and actually went to his city
Day 1 and first meet with him:
All exhausted he wanted me to come to a café. When I went inside I saw a group of 5 friends which he was inside. I met the guys out of kindness and never made it a problem: went on with the convo with the peeps and didn’t make it weird. So two of the friends left and we four went and had a dinner together, again I didn’t make it a problem and then his friends left and we went to the hotel but he acted very weird there. He acted very nervous and hasty said his mama is calling and urgently left. I was left in a hotel room staring at the cellar thinking “TF I’m doing with my life” and slept anyways.
Day 2 with him:
That morning I woke up early and had a breakfast in hotel while awaiting his magesty to wake up. Eventually he woke up and then we went for a meal. He was infront of me staring at his phone and then I played along and also did the same, there was a little talk. He showed me poems he written at some point. I appreciated them even though I suspected that they’re written for someone else. He asked if he can call his friend B (girl) In order not to make situation weirder, I accepted it and said she would be more than welcome, in fact: I wanted to stay alone with him and get used to him you know because I’m kind of introverted and getting used to people takes time. Anyways she came with her pet dog and then at some point our guest B, called her friend E (male). I also didn’t make it weird and also said he would be more than welcome out of kindness. The reason I accepted these guests because I thought he was excited about me and wanted to introduce me to his friends so I didn’t bother at first but then these temporary guests became permanent and spent rest of their evenings with us and there was so little time until my bus and I was quite mad that despite all my efforts I couldn’t stay alone, get to know him. At some point I was quite annoyed and sent these guests away and with all my curiosity and confusion I started questioning him why we couldn’t spend sometime alone. He made his point but it didn’t satisfy me and since I had little time to catch the bus I kept it short said my goodbyes and left
The weird way back to home:
I went to bus station and called him last time before I get on the bus and made a very joyful talk and he said “Why can’t you be this joyful and talkative when we were together? He kind of complained about my double sided personality which was true because I have different personalities for phone-talk and real life.
Home:
I went home and we didn’t talk. I sent some memes and reels but didn’t get a feedback. He called me at night and he said he don’t want “this” to keep going. When I asked the question that “Why couldn’t we stay alone?” several times he said he couldn’t forget his ex and then I said “I respect you and wish you happiness” and then hang up on him.
This was over and I can’t get over this since 2 years. It’s like a heavy burden on my chest. I know for a fact that you guys can’t help me but something you say or making a point can relieve me, I don’t know.