I first met her in a class where we got paired up with each other. Usually, when a professor asks for a “group get-together,” which is just a fancy way of saying “group talk,” I don’t even move. And I didn’t that day. The professor noticed, I guess, and I think also noticed that my gf, who I hadn’t met at the time, was doing the same thing. The professor paired the two of us up. I didn’t really like engaging in conversation with people I didn’t know, because I am very self conscious about my appearance and how I come off to other people. So we just talked about what the teacher told us to talk about. The conversation did end up going off on a tangent about completely unrelated stuff. That day I just thought the only reason she was talking to me in the first place was because our teacher paired us up. But the next day, she walked over to my seat and started talking to me again, without any guidance from the professor. I’ll admit, the first week or so I felt kind of uncomfortable, but after a while, it was *me* that moved to *her* seat. I didn’t really know why I did that at first, but the more we talked, the more I found I enjoyed talking to her. We started talking to each other in other classes, as well. When valentines day arrived, I felt the need to do *something.* If not for telling her how I feel, just a Reese’s cup, because I know she likes Reese’s. I bought the Reese’s the day before valentines day. Originally, I wasn’t going to write the note, but it was kind of killing me (figuratively) not saying anything, because it oddly made me feel more alone than I would have otherwise. So I wrote the note, and screwed up a couple times because my professor, a different one, was telling an anecdote about something I can’t remember, and I kept getting the words on paper mixed up with the words said by the professor. During that class, the teacher allows us to take 5 minute breaks to get food from the vending machines or use the restroom. During the break, I saw her, my gf before we were a couple, give a mutual friend (lets call him TJ) a valentines. I was surprised at the time, and was kind of hurt, but I really blamed myself over anybody else. I wasn’t even jealous, because I knew him, and he was a nice guy, and if it wasn’t me, I was glad it was him. But towards the middle of the five minutes, TJ walked up to me and handed me the valentines that was given to him, and he said “This is for you.” I was confused, and I opened the valentines, and at the very top of the page, it said my name. I’m kind of embarrassed to admit that it took me a full 30 seconds of standing there looking at my name to figure out what happened, because it felt like my mind was working on half speed. The next day I gave her a valentines. We’ve been dating up to this point, but I kind of feel like I am dependent on her presence. I feel lonely when we don’t talk, and when I am not around her. I’m afraid that what I feel isn’t love, but addiction, which scares me, because she acts like she loves me.
TLDR: Me and my girlfriend have been dating for a while, and I am afraid that what I feel for her is more of an addiction, as I don’t like her not being around.