When I met my husband almost 10 years ago he was into bodybuilding. He has always on again off again taken steroids. Throughout our relationship it has had serious consequences, where it has messed with his head so badly that he was suicidal. He has told me many times he will stop and he is finished with it but he doesn’t.
About 6 months ago we had a massive blow up and I said no more because it affects his mood, how he reacts, he is a different person. He agreed he would stop forever. Recently I saw steroids arrive in a package to our house, I confronted him and he went CRAZY screaming g and crying and yelling, whilst I sat there in shock. He then was trying to gaslight saying they wernt for him etc. he took off.
I ended up counting the pill bottle and noticed he had already taken some. When I asked he said that he needed to try them to make sure they were ok as they were for a friend… lying. But I let it go because I hate yelling, arguing and confrontation.
Today in the mail he recieved growth hormone, more steroids.. this is only maybe a month after the last issue. I havnt even said anything yet because of the above. I’m sick of it. We have 2 small children and have been together a decade but I can’t take this anymore. I’m sick of the lies and deception. It’s not only the way it completely changes him, but it is also very expensive and incredibly dangling to his health. Being that he also has a family history of heart issues…
I don’t know what to do or where to go from here because it’s obvious the lies will continue. And as I said above I hate the confrontation and I hate yelling etc.
EDIT: He doesn’t think he has an addiction at all, he thinks it keeps him healthy and at his best etc.. whilst I don’t believe he “abuses them” as such, he can’t live without it..
Currently I believe he is taking testosterone, Growth hormone and some prescription medication like metformin.
TDLR My husband is taking steroids and keeps lying to me