I (37m) am finding navigating let’s say my private / social side of my life with my wife (36f) more and more awkward.
We are seven months married. Generally things are great, but recently there are some hairline cracks developing that are beginning to trouble me.
In January I started going to the gym and now I try go to the gym 3 times a week, Monday, Wednesday, Friday after work. I get home at around 7pm, going there directly after work At first she was supportive but every time I go now is a drama and I get passive aggressive comments like – “I’m now married to the gym am I?”
Whenever I make plans (without her) to see my friends. She gets cold and it makes her sad that I go out because in her words – it takes away time we could be spending together. For example, on Friday I was invited to meet up with a friend on Sunday afternoon / evening. So today I met up with the friend that I have not seen properly since our wedding to watch some soccer in a bar. I left home at 14.30 and am now on the way home at 22.30. Whilst I’ve been out she has sent me a message saying that “she hopes it was worth it and its remarkable that I forgot my phone”. In other words why am I not sending her messages whilst I’m gone – being away for eight hours. She stayed at home during my meet up. I have not even had drinks with the friend, I am sober, I don’t drink much at all. I don’t understand the passive aggression.
We spent all of Friday and Saturday together, and Sunday morning. The previous weekend (a four day weekend in the UK) we spent the whole weekend together and visited some other friends together.
I have no history of cheating or meanness with her. We spend loads of time together and I often invite her along to see friends. At home we do loads of stuff together – all day.
Is this reason / unreasoble behaviour? What should I do, am I in the wrong here? Is this how marriage is?