I (33F) have been seeing this guy (36M) for a few weeks now. We are not official so I don’t know if I have a right to feel a bit weird about this, if I am being over sensitive or if I’m in the early stages of love bombing.
It’s my birthday today. A couple of weeks ago at dinner he asked if I wanted to see a show with him tonight. I said I couldn’t as it was my birthday and I already had plans with my sister. He asked me if he could have my address to send me something for my actual birthday, but I said there’s really no need (also I didn’t want to give out my personal address so soon).
A few days later on another date, he once again asks me again if I’m free tonight. I said no, it’s my birthday and I have plans. He said “oh, of course!” and we didn’t speak about it any more.
Next time I saw him, which was 2 days ago, we both had the day off work and he suggested we hang out. He asked if I wanted to come by his apartment as he “wanted to give me a small token for my birthday”. I went to his, we had lunch, we had sex, and there wasn’t a gift there. I didn’t really think about the gift until I left, but I did think it was a bit strange to have mentioned it as if he already had bought the gift.
However, he texted me later that evening saying he’d love to see me again on Sunday (tomorrow). I said sure, why doesn’t he come to mine this time and we can cook and watch movies. He said he’d love to and please could I send him my address so he can send me a gift for my birthday? I said that’s really sweet of him and as we’d been intimate, I gave it him.
Well, today is my birthday and nothing has arrived. He simply sent a text saying “hi, what time are we meeting tomorrow?”. Obviously he has forgotten my birthday but I just find it a bit odd considering he’s asked to send me a gift twice, and didn’t have a gift that he promised he had at his before. I think it’s very convenient that he remembered his dick’s needs tomorrow though.
I’ve been love bombed so many times and don’t want to get strung along. It makes me uncomfortable to bring up my birthday to him as well. Really it shouldn’t be a big deal but it’s more the expectation of getting sent something and being let down. I am so used to false promises. If I’m being honest I don’t really want him coming by tomorrow if all he wants is sex, either.
I do think he’s dating other people but I don’t want anything casual and have made this adamantly clear from the beginning.
What should I say to him, if anything?