Im 33 years old, having 1 kid, still married but not happy and always feel lonely.
Hi, this is my 1st posting. 1st of all, I wanted to tell that I came from a family which religion really matters n important. As in the marriage, we are not allowed to file for a divorce. Unfortunately its me who wanting to do the divorce bcse my husband betrayed me when I was pregnant 3 years ago. He had been different and extremely difficult now.
I still keep the receipt of him texting on the dating apps, his dating apps profile, picture of women that he went out, some violence picture towards me (no medical report or police report done) and also few recording of him cursed me n yell at me.
We’ve been separated for almost a year in 2023. I filed divorce through JPN where at this point, we we’re actually need to go through couple counseling for 3 months. But the end story in JPN process was, we both agree to divorce and that lead us to find our own lawyer(both of us didnt find our own lawyer).
At that point after the JPN, I somehow realized that my son which at that time was just abt 1 year old really needs his father to grow up. I’ve always surrounded by guilty feelings when I saw other kids who are able to be together with both their parents. My kid dont have the chance. So, I told myself, let’s just give it a second chance and I talked to my husband and he agreed to fix the marriage with certain rules. (How come he is able to put rules when he is the 1 did the wrongful decis action in our marriage-anyhow, I still followed his rules).
*The rules are- I cant check his phone, I cant bring up the past*
I moved back to his house, I was having a very heavy heart, felt scared, still traumatised but im doing it for the sake of my kid. For 2-3 weeks, the relationship was ok, no fight, I guess he is also doing some effort to make sure we r not fighting, but 1 day i just noticed that he had been texting again with non local women who also got kids.. Oh God..My heart.. We fought and he said sorry he wont be doing it again.. but the trust again been robbed from me again n again..
After the incident, we keep on fighting. I need help to get out from this toxic environment. Im unable to stay focus. I feel scared.
If I meet my lawyer, what’s the possibility that will happen? Any women here faced the same thing? Can share to me how’s your journey?
Thanks.