Hi im m24 and i always had problems socializing but theres a series of things that started recently (these lasts few years) that i dont know how to handle, the 1st and mayor thing id say it would be that most of the time im incapable to talk normally to certain people “close friends” mostly, because even when im doing the most mundane thing like playjng a card game i get like really overwhelmed and start tearing up for no reason, even when i try to talk to someone that ive known for years when i go out i ussually need to blast a few drinks beforehand when we all gather at a bar/pub to not feel like this cuz it makes me unable to even make eye contact with them.
This issue has caused me a lot of problems making me really insecure and self-isolate and feeling that i ruin the mood of the place that im at, and causing people to act towards me in a babysitting kind of way, even making faces that im like bothering them or something.