Now that I’m 20 it feels like that’s it you had your fun made friends you laughed and cried and created memories and now it’s over you won’t experience happiness like that ever again and you will become a grumpy pathetic little man whom nobody wants to be around it’s so odd and I can’t put it into words how I’m feeling obviously I’m still young but it feels like I can only observe life and not feel it because I did experience life somewhat as a kid and teenager and now it’s gone obviously I want to make friends and have fun but it feels weird and like I’m not allowed obviously I have time but at the same time do I? Most people will be working and others move and making friends new friends and slowly drift away I’m genuinely scared of life and the future but not to a degree where I’m sad or depressed just not sure about most things