I masterbate a lot, usually with vibes, sometimes finger. Often…or I guess usually …with porn. I’m late 30s, and I’ve been masterbating since I was a teen. Been having sex since then too. And in all this time, whenever someone goes down on me, I find it relaxing, but not really stimulating. I’ve even fallen asleep before. 🫣 I feel bad for my current partner, who is getting discouraged. I *want* to cum, and I want to help him help me. I’m not very good at communicating what I need sexually. Those times I *have* cum from oral/touching from another person, it’s taken a loooong time. I’ve gotten there by trying hard to imagine that I’m in specific scenerios (often CNC) or trying to picture in detail a hot person in my head. The CNC scenerios are what make communication hard – if I speak about what I want, it takes me out of imagining that I’m in that CNC scenerio (ie being taken advantage of).
Does anyone have any ideas on how I can improve on this? I’d reallt rather avoid watching porn while being attended to. Has anyone improved their ability to cum via clit, from someone else?