So I (22 by the time) two years back met a girl (was 23) and did not even look at her as a potential to make something. We mostly met with friends, had fun and didn’t talk too much and the contact was purely because of mutual friends we had. After some incident the friendship with her went away, she disappeared.
After some time maybe half a year we met again at 1st of January two years back. She was not feeling so good there, I felt it in my bones something is not right. Gently while had a chance asked what’s going on… and this night we spent most of the party in the car just talking because she had to throw out the sadness she had inside. Doesn’t matter for the story what it was. From this moment we started to get better contact, became friends. I did not think about her the way she would be the girl I want to spend my life with by the time.
We had some beautiful times together, with friends around and also spent late nights just chilling, drinking, going out to movies… worked through worst times of our lives together. She is always there for me and I am always there for her. No matter what happened we sticked together. We built a bond that is strong enough that even when I started working abroad we just do have beautiful synergy even if we’re 800 miles apart.
The thing is I did not even think once for those two years that went from this 1st Jan that she could be a material or potential to make something more, specially where we did not have any sexual activities, no kissing, relationship purely friendly.
We did clarify for each other that we’re not each other type physically, and the thing is… for me it changed. I started to think she’s attractive. For some time I was thinking this through and I did not find any reason not to try expect the fact I got clarified as not her type before, also she was a little burned out from love for those two years (just like me tbh…) we both did not try to find someone. But infact I fell in love with her and i did not do really much until last week.
This time she had her birthday I didn’t just call and ordered a gift. I came there for few days and tried my best to make her day more special than ever. As I said we’re separated with 800 miles so coming here just to make her day a bit more special is a commitment. Made her day better. Also tried to be a bit romantic and I don’t know what she thought of that, but as the contact is as usual (good) so I’m a bit optimistic.
Let’s clarify. Only thing saying no at the time two years back was the fact we were not each others types. We both like the others personality. There is no doubt. So I wonder if finding someone attractive while being long term friends is possible. And how to approach it, I am not confident enough to straight get to business like I used to with girls I liked this way, because I am scared I am not going anywhere if I try but perspective of destroying friendship or being stuck friendzoned are both bad for my head so there is no way to do anything there.
Now I am going to work in few days and I will quit my job in the summer… just because she finally want to find a job and go with me abroad for some time and also I must be back home in the summer because I have to work on my car and I have plans for summer that include her, also family situation.
Tl;dr I fell in love with a girl that we were friends for two years and I am scared of rejection, specially where we both said before we’re not each other type. If I try and it fails I will lose friend, if it works I’ll be finally happy.
Every advice is helpful for me. Feel free to ask if something is too chaotic. I will throw an edit if something change.