Been in love with my close friend for a yeard and a half. I confessed to him a year ago, he rejected me, as I expected, and both of us were perfectly fine with remaining friends. I distanced myself a little bit at the time cause I didn’t want to make him uncorfortable. We grew closer again gradually, he’s a very touchy person with everyone, so he started being touchy with my slowly as well. I let him do it cause I didn’t care, knew he did it to everyone, and he was the one starting those interactions, so I don’t think he was unconfortable with me.
I moved on from him and things were great. Then, we got closer and closer by the end of last year. We already messaged each other everyday before, but we started having calls alone every other week and also hanging out by ourselves.
He started holding my hand and playing with it sometimes, I’ve seen him play with other friends hands, but not like that, more like figdeting because he has ADHD, but even if with mine it looked different, I decided to brush it off.
We went out with a friend who asked later if there was something going on between us because that night we held hands and he put his arm around me and caressed me while I rested my head on his shoulder and he put his head on mine. My friend, who knows he’s very affectionate and touchy, told me that even so it was weird and that he was doing things beyond what he did with other friends. But then he told this friend of ours that it didn’t mean anything. It was too late, I was already falling for him again.
A month later I went to his house and we shared some back and fourth kisses on the cheek, and he also gave me one on the forehead. We stayed in long hugs and there was a point when we lied on his bed and fell asleep hugging each other, we were so close, my nose was touching his cheek. I went home and thought that maybe this was leading up to something.
A week later, he acted like nothing had happened. I am so confused. I don’t know if those were signs that he likes me now or if he just felt needy that day.
I’m going to his house again next week. It’s been abt a month since I went the last time. If similar things happen again I’m thinking abt asking him what do they mean and tell him that if he doesn’t want anything but frienship with me, that he stops doing that, and maybe even that we should take some time away from each other.
Some friends of mine said that if those things happen again and I feel like there’s a mood being set, that I should kiss him (cause he’s really slow, that’s a fact), but I’m too scared to read things wrong, even though this look so much like signs and I really felt a mood between us that day, ans I’m scared that if I read them wrong and kiss him, it becomes harassment. I really don’t want that to happen cause I’m not that kind of person.
So, I need to know. Are these signs? How should I approach him to talk to him abt it? And if I should kiss him or is that a terrible idea?