My boyfriend and I got together maybe a month ago but started talking around the start of January. We’ve known each other since I was 17 and used to hook up back then when I was dumb and delusional over him. Eventually I got over it and ignored him. He recently got back into contact and apologised for the way he treated me back and that he took me for granted. I think anyone’s ears would perk up when they hear this lol.
After talking a lot I realised he was starting to like me and eventually I felt the same way. We decided to become exclusive. Since then I noticed he just isn’t very present we text maybe 2 times a day. He tells me he sees my texts and thinks about replying later. He’s just very inconsistent as opposed to before which I can’t blame him as we are in different stages of university. I’m in my first year he’s in his second which I know is a lot more work but I just feel like he talks to me when it’s convenient. He also dosent really tell me much about what he’s doing or his day. It stresses me a lot because I feel like I tell him so much just to carry on or start a conversation.
He’s also not very romantic. I’m very much a lover girl I’m talking poems,gifts etc. I’m very thoughtful. But I notice he just isn’t. He says he’s working on it but I’ve not seen any attempts and I’ve told him the way I feel and he just says if you expect me to be sappy then hit the road cause it’s not him. I feel weird as he says I’m cringey but he really likes it. He also dosent really compliment me much. I send hun every outfit, new hairstyle or whatever and I just get “looks nice” I feel very confused. I feel as though he can’t give me 100% right now which is understandable but I’d rather not settle for 30% right now. I’ve tried to suggesting me travelling to his city and going for lunch or even just dinner but he dosent say his schedule. I try to make plans and he just dosent seem into it.
Summer is about 2 months away and I feel like If we go on a break I’ll be a little bit less stressed about us. I also notice myself going a bit crazy and delusional again which I hate because he says he loves it but I truly am suffering in my own head. I think I need to just work on myself and how I feel about relationships again. I’m also becoming more busy because of university as exams are approaching so I’d like to be a bit smarter with my time.
All in all I love my boyfriend and he’s had a massive change from who he used to be but I never expected getting into a relationship I’d feel so lonely and almost unloved. He’s not all bad as he said he loves me first but he struggles with saying it. And in person I don’t feel unloved at all. Just when we are away from each other which is most of the time.
Also if anyone thinks he’s cheating tbh he’s reassured me loads of times but I am not really worried about that. If I find out I will easily cut it off. I just have no evidence to say he is so I’m choosing to trust.
Will suggesting a break be m I also have a feeling suggesting this will make him feel a bit upset as I previously tried to end things because he said I’m always complaining and that just set me off. He says he’s never felt this way about anyone before but I just feel like he feels indifferent about me.
Also adding he’s planning to go for a year abroad in September in a different continent so if things are bad now I can’t imagine how much worse they could get.
TL:DR: thinking to go on a break with long distance boyfriend as contact is inconsistent and I’ve mentioned it but it’s not improved.