Myself (50m) and my partner (45f) of 18 years were to go on a family trip with our daughter to her family in Poland. Many of her relations live in the UK, us in Ireland, we see them quite often. The plan was a christening of one of her nieces in Polany, everyone goes to it.
My partner couldn’t get flights initially as the usual route to her city in Poland has been pulled off the schedule. Weeks before the trip I suggested two other airports and we settled on one 2.5 hours drive from our destination.
I’ll speed this up for those of you still hanging on! She saw flights at a good price one morning and asked shou she buy them; I know how much she wants to go and I’m happy to join her so I say yes. Problem occured that my weeks time off work crossed over with my manager and long story short, the big boss was giving no flexibility and so it was either I don’t go or go, take unauthorised time off, not be paid for it and deal with bs on my return.
On top of this myself and my partner are going through a rocky period with almost as zero communication. I ended up not going because I really couldn’t afford not being paid and the created bad atmosphere in work (where we have a small team)
Partner wasn’t happy but went and following the holiday is now complaining about how much money she’s spent. On accommodation which I had no input with and which was with 6 other members of her family, on holiday day to day expenses for her and our daughter.
I paid half the total flights straight away when I realised I wasn’t going.
Question: what is fair for me to pay her as she says she shouldn’t be out of pocket. Additional context is she has a better paid and benefits employment by about €12,000 and I’ve said I’m willing to contribute.
TL/DR: Payment dispute with trip I couldn’t take