I’m a married 21 F to 22M, am I the crazy one?
My husband and I have been married for two years now. My husband will be referred to as “John”.
When I met him I was in a fragile state. I had an ex I just left that was my first love who I was obsessed with. I met John through a friend and I kinda forced a connection with John and we ended up going on a date. We did not have much in common however I thought it was love.
Fast forward, we get married and buy a house together. I am pretty much alone due to John’s job.
I take care of the house, work full time and in college full time. We go through the worse patch of it all and it’s him leaving for months on end. I go out with my friends and party it up as I am alone and that seems to keep me happy. I figure out a balance to everything. I ended up going on a day trip with my best friend and John gets upset. He is in another country and apparently I need to stay home for 6 months and wait to have fun whenever he gets back based on how he is acting. During this time I felt so alone and had multiple guys speaking to me and I felt very dirty about it.
Now, I tried focusing on our marriage and I am trying to keep things fresh. I tried getting into video games so I can have something in common with him and once I find a game we both like he ends up getting off of it completely leaving us with nothing in common. I explain to him how I feel but constantly get it Turned back around on me. Tonight, he put his hands on me by grabbing my wrist really hard and it hurt. He did so out of anger. I am extremely upset. I get flashbacks on how my parents would grab me and hurt me. My husband is supposed to be my protector not someone who I do not trust.
He says I am crazy, am I crazy for being upset about him putting his hands on me? What advice could you give? I wanna make this work because I wanna love him and I am scared to be so young and divorced.