My BF (20) and I (21) have been dating for 9 months. He’s in the military deployed in Poland, so we’ve been long distance for 8 months now.
He sent flowers to his female best friend. With it, he gave her a card with a note that reads, “As an appreciation for being by my side through thick and thin and being the light to my life, I love you [his name]”.
She posted the flowers on her Instagram story, and she doesn’t know that I know her Instagram at all. Her story was the flowers in the background with the note on top of the flowers in a heart and a screenshot of him on a FaceTime call in a heart.
To give context, they have been long distance best friends for about 4 years. He mentioned her twice throughout the relationship, and how they are like brother and sister, are able to joke around and have fun and how they’re protective of each other. I never got to meet her or talk to her, and my BF and I never gotten around to doing so, as I have a close male friend of 12 years. I don’t really know her at all but only because we haven’t gotten around to it.
He has been distant from me for the past four or so months. He hasn’t said I’m the light of his life, I love you or anything affectionate in our relationship. I get a text back from him every 5-6 days, and he is emotionally closed off and private about his life besides his work schedule to communicate why he can’t text back. The thing is that he posts on his story everyday. I’m very open about my life to him, and he doesn’t ask any questions about me. He is very willing to support me emotionally and talk through any issue or concern. Since his time in Poland, he hasn’t been “able” to call me because of the WiFi. I’ve been reminding him and tried to help him figure out the situation as others in Poland have and could call. We haven’t had a phone call, but he called my other best friend (she told me recently) on her birthday. He recently forgot my birthday and did not do anything for me but apologize. Shortly after, I found the story, which showed a screenshot of him on a recent FaceTime call.
It seems like he is depending on her emotionally and is/feels closer to her, while he is growing distant from me. I brought it up to him recently but told him we’re not going to discuss it. To me, him calling her after I pressed him for 8 months and doing/saying relationship-esque things he hasn’t for me, made the distance very clear.
I know it’s valid why my feelings are hurt, but I don’t know whether this is an emotional affair or cheating based off this alone.
TDLR: BF sent flowers and a note to his female best friend of 4 years, while being distant from me. The note is in quotations above. He is closer to her than me and is doing/saying relationship-esque things for her not me. Emotional cheating?