(I use the I need advice thing but also just a bit of venting)
To be blunt I don’t belive in casual dating it’s just never been for me it makes me feel cheap and icky and just Dosent go with my personal morals (for clarity I have no beef with anyone who likes causal dating I think it can be fun and great for people who can handle it and for those whose morals are ok with it. I’m fully supportive of those who do it but it’s just not for me.)
(My views on causal dating also goes for casual intimacy to be very clear)
I have an ex, an ex I loved deeply, I loved him since we were kids. Since I was 10 to be exact. My family was deeply dysfunctional (I’ve gotten therapy and cope very well but still I just never got the “loving family experience” from my bio family) because my bio family was so damaged his took me in as there own, even tho we were childhood sweethearts and I know that Dosent always work out I genuinely did want to become part of his family in the marital sense. I wanted to spend my life with him and have kids with him. His mom was more like a mom then my own to me, i still see her as my mom. (Because she’s still there for me as mother) (I’m also still very close with his siblings and family)
This ex was a big part of my life, he may not always be part of my life but his family will always be as any new boyfriend I get would be introduced to his mom not mine. (Mines not a nice human being and dislikes men in general and like putting me down) (his mom on the other hand is the kindest human being and so wonderful but also protective enough over me to have an opinion)
(He and I dated for 4 years but Ive loved him for nearly a decade)
Im still in love with my ex to be blunt, I’ve accepted the break up and Im ok with it and understand it and am not in that detrimental aftermath anymore. My focus is working on falling out of love with him and just moving of from what I thought would be the rest of my life.
And some people think that means it time to “go wild start dating again”
I have no interest but get comments and some pressure about it 🤦♀️
So I mean idk am I wrong for not wanting to date again
I have no interest in being physically with anyone else so that aspect wouldn’t work out, as I’d only be thinking about my ex and feeling gross and guilty (it would feel like cheating even tho it’s not and I’m aware it’s not just since I still love him and all)
I’m also just not interested I see no point in jumping back into dating.
Plus any dating I did do would be with serious intent, and I don’t wanna start another long term relationships in love with someone else
I’ve explained those 3 things to people but they still don’t seem to get it, they tell me stuff like “what’s the harm” and other stuff like that which makes me feel a bit conflicted.
Idk due to the internal conflict, I poked over some dating subs, felt nothing 0 interest, which only solidified my feelings for me,
But idk am I just being dramatic for not wanting to date? Is there any point even trying while still being in love with my ex? Idk I just feel like I know my feelings but so many people disagree so it makes me feel uncertain. Idk what do you think?