2 years or a year and a half ago I was going through a mental decay and my mental health wasnt in the best of state, not to mention I had an alcohol problem while going through it. Basically I ran away from my problems and not to mention from people, I got called out for my behaviour from one of my close friends at that time and decided that I shouldnt be friends with them anymore because in my head I hurt them and I don’t deserve them, and so I just hid and ghosted everyone I knew and that one person I did explain everything to her and she gave me a chance to just talk about it and talking about feelings and deep serious stuff isnt rlly my forte and I just didnt explain further. At first she was understanding? idk but as more time passed I think It hurt her more and I just didnt do anything.
Maybe a month or a few weeks after that I got help and got a therapist and cleaned my act and sober up and I decided to write a lengthy and sincere letter to my close friend and basically it said hey I fucked up im very very sorry I wish for us to be friends again. They said that they dont think we should be friends anymore and it is for the best. After that, it began to take a toll on my mental health but I knew and understood that I can’t just run away from this again and to just face it head on and learn to be better
That said It was just them I turned my back on but everyone I knew, even school friends and I don’t rlly have any friends anymore apart from like 1 or two school friends but its better than nothing. In recent times I feel better and generally healthier and back to my old self more or less ya know confident and just happy appreciating the little things in life, and I feel ready and want to re intigrate and re introduce myself back to the people in that chapter of my life and just catch up ya know?
I dont wanna just be like Heyyyyyyyyy its mee again ya know that guy who just ghosted all of ya, here I am again whats up? it feels rude to do that approach. Any tips and ideas would be greatly appreciated, normally I’m not shy or introverted and im more of a talkative extrovert but I dont want to come off the wrong way