Ok so I can finally see 1 crucial point that makes all of my face-to-face interaction so awkward, while i usually have no problem talking by phone or talking side-by-side (like, when driving or walking around with someone) : i don’t know at which point it’s “appropriate” to quit staring. Sometimes it’s too soon, sometimes too late :
* After I ask a question, I guess it’s normal to keep looking at the other person until they give an answer. But after \*I\* give an answer to their question, do i look away to indicate I’m done, or do I keep looking in case the other person has something to add ?
* If I look away too fast, it gives the other person the impression that I am not interested in the conversation, while i just want to show that my sentence is finished and I won’t add anything more.
* If I keep looking too long, it puts pressure on the other person to speak, as if I was expecting something from them. It can lead to an endless loop when we both have nothing to say but we keep talking just because none of us know when it’s polite to stop.
* Eventually, in the worst cases, i enter the cringey “back and forth puppils” thing : i look away (1 sec) –> i don’t know if person B wanted to add something so i look back (1 sec) –> they see me looking back, now they expect me to say something (1 sec) –> i look away to indicate a false alarm, no i don’t have anything to say (1 sec) –> repeat …
Maybe it’s a cultural thing and that’s different between countries, like talking with your hands or interupting mid-sentence to show you’re invested ? Idk.
Anyway, bless whoever invented sunglasses.