I’m currently at uni and have about 3 good friends; there used to be a group of 8 of us last year, but 1 dropped out, 2 are in a relationship and left us, and the other tried to ruin my other friends relationship and has distanced herself from us.
Don’t get me wrong, we do meet up and do regular things like shopping, having drinks, and clubbing, but that’s really it, and that only happens once a week or so. But I really want to do things I see other people do like going to the beach/park at night and get wasted, go to restaurants, or having a party; the latter I can’t do because there’s enough people.
I see people having costume parties with about 20 people, and it makes me feel incredibly lonely and I feel like I’ve missed out on those type of activities. My bday is coming up and there will only be 4 of us going out. What doesn’t help is that my friends never want to take photos or videos of us, so I don’t have many pics to post or send to people, in comparison to when I see people posting such amazing pics of them having fun. I’m trying to expand my friend circle but nobody wants anything to do with me and it causes me to overthink about what value I have in other peoples lives.
I just think my life is mediocre and basic and I really want to live the best life, except I have very few people to share it with.