I am sorry if this is not the right subreddit if so please direct me to the one.
I ’25 F’ had a coworker ’29 M’ who used to work in the same building as me and we sometimes made small talk, he was very nice, kind, and extremely good-looking, I never thought of him as anything because he was very handsome and I am just average. we became a bit closer but he left the place that we used to work in (we both work in the same profession and it requires us to work in a particular place for a month and then the next month the government distributes us to other places randomly).
I texted him a month later asking about some work-related stuff and he texted back immediately, he was his usual nice self, the thing is I don’t know if it’s normal because I was never close to people, especially guys he kept the conversation going which was weird since my guy friends usually answer my question and nothing else. I felt comfortable texting him some more times and it was all the same almost every time I texted he made sure to ask about me and how is my day etc… just small talk.
I randomly texted him asking about how is his work and he replied, I am the one who usually texts, I am ashamed to admit that I kinda like him now. I don’t know how to proceed.
I am ashamed to admit that I have never been in any relationships in my life with anyone, mostly because I am bad at social cues and interactions, in my days in college I never went out or hung out with people, my only relationship with people was purely work-related. even back in high school I never dated.
I don’t know how to be in a relationship or what is normal. I am scared of messing it up and I am scared to talk to people about this stuff because they judge me.
My whole life I was scared of men and love due to my dad being the worst example and my mom being paranoid she was always scared of men, so I naturally kept as far away from men as possible, when I turned 18 and lived by myself for some time I started being a bit more open and changed my view on love. for the longest time, I swore that I would never love or get married that’s how traumatized I was.
I just want to add that here is extremely rare for women to confess first and are looked down upon if did.
TL;DR: I have a crush on a guy out of my league and am ashamed of having no experience with relationships so I can not tell if he likes me or it’s normal guy stuff.
Please ask me stuff if I didn’t clarify enough since English is not my first language I would appreciate any comment since I have no one else to ask.