I (29F) currently live with my partner (31M) in a house under his name. We have lived together for the past couple years and were engaged to be married last year, but ended up cancelling the wedding because of issues we experienced with his family. I moved out temporarily in Fall 2023 and returned a few months later once things settled down from the wedding cancellation. We are still together and are working through our issues.
My partner is relocating for work for 2 years and likely returning to our current city after his 2 years of training. My initial plan was to move with him for work but since we are not married I am not comfortable giving up my job and life in this city to move with him.
He bought this house a few years ago knowing he was going to move for these 2 years and his plan was to either sell the house or use it as a rental during this time. Since I am staying in this city, I want to stay in our house. However, I can only contribute around 1000/month to the \~2500/month in total costs.
He will be renting a condo in a different city and earning a significant income to cover the remaining 1500/month on his house, but he wants to rent it to someone else to have the entire house covered. He has suggested since I can’t afford it that I:
a) find a friend to move in as a roommate
b) move back in with my parents for 1-2 years (his argument is that they spend 6 months of the year out of country so I would have their house to myself, which is down the street from us)
c) rent a small apartment within my budget
I have supported him throughout his medical residency by cooking, cleaning, shopping etc and feel that him now essentially evicting me to make money is a betrayal of our relationship and his support for me. His argument is that he is still in significant debt and he” isn’t comfortable staying in this much debt/falling into further debt to subsidize my life.” He will also be paying for flights for us to visit back and forth assuming we stay together through all of this. I may end things altogether if he actually expects me to pack up and move out.
Does anyone have any suggestions on how to manage this? Any suggestions for living arrangements that haven’t been mentioned?