Hi everyone, first time poster. Not sure what I really want from this except validation after years of being gas lit.
For context this happened back in 2021 I believe so details are hazy.
I (29F) have been with my husband(36M) for going on 12 years later this year. Married 9 at this point. We got together shortly after I turned 18. We have known each other for over 20 years however.
Into this story:
My grandma had gotten sick with covid and was needing help and me being a SAHM and virtually homeschooling our kids I was obviously a great option to also help with her since I could manage it with my lifestyle pretty well. We live with my mom. And for multiple excuses my husband does not work. That’s a story for another day. My husband DOES have some health issues but that’s not important to this story.
I had been helping with my grandma and at that time I was probably staying at my aunts house(she lives with my aunt who works fulltime) to make things easier on myself and the kids. I guess I was so busy that the whole time period is kind of a blur. We could have lost my grandma.
Anyways, I don’t know how long we had been back home but my other aunt invited us over for our kids to play with her grandson(his dad was murdered and his mom keeps him away from us) so I decided we needed to go because my kids LOVE him and I didn’t want them to miss an opportunity. My husband was invited to come with. He declined. He has anxiety but he just doesn’t like going anywhere or doing anything. So the kids and I left. I vaguely remember him messaging me but not exactly what. I know he was being cryptic and hinted at not being a problem anymore or something like that. I tried calling him but couldn’t reach him. I got a call shortly after from a police officer saying he had self harmed. He was taken to the hospital and I wasn’t allowed to see him. I chose which psyche ward they would send him to out of the 2 options I was given. And that’s basically the important info on what led up to the incident.
Fast forward to later on, not sure when. He tells me that he wasn’t trying to off himself. He says he didn’t feel like I was giving him enough attention so he did it basically as a way to get my attention. So….my grandma could have died, I was doing everything for our kids, and giving him attention but apparently not enough. He did it in our bedroom where if he hadn’t made his way outside and a neighbor helped and got him help our children and I would have found him when we got home.
I don’t know what I’m looking for. Maybe just venting and wanting others insight on things… I don’t know. I have plenty of other stories of other things but I wanted to share this. I may make other posts more current with our current situation. As of now we are still together but he is no longer in our house.
Due to religious reasons I will not divorce him. However as it stands we are living separately and I don’t have any intentions on him coming back after all that has transpired and he has said/done. Just for an added note. I know not everyone is religious and divorce is always an option in some peoples mind and I respect others in their decisions. I hope you will be gentle in addressing this part.