Hey, I’m 24f (bi). I’m behind on the dating scene. I went out on a few lame teenage dates and had some LDRs online, but nothing to write home about and certainly nothing intimate.
I’ve only just jumped into the dating pool as I’m finally living independently and I’ve been inundated with terrible experiences. Everyone seems to try and lie, manipulate or guilt me to going back with them to their place on the first date. I’m not ready for physical intimacy right away like that, and I make that clear both on my dating app bios, and in person. Doesn’t seem to make a difference; I still get pushed, begged, and shamed.
Is it old fashioned of me not to want to do this? I wouldn’t like my first time with a guy or girl to be with a stranger on a first date. But when I ask my friends, almost ALL of them say that this is a constant, normal thing for them, and is usually how they met their partners. I definitely feel a lot of guilt and embarrassment. Maybe I am just a prude, but I’d prefer to build tension and anticipation and get to know someone for a few weeks, or even months, though I know nowadays that’s apparently VERY excessive… (okay edit, not months, I just think i really would need at least A month.)
Curious to hear people’s thoughts. Thanks.