This is very hard for me to write because right now I am feeling very violated and gross and disrespected. I need help getting over this situation.
I’ve been dating a guy for the last 5 months. He is 35m and I am 39f. I just found out the other day…he has not washed his bedsheets in over a year (likely longer). I have been naked and sweaty and everything in those sheets (long sex sessions, period sex, etc) Along with other women he has been with. I feel so gross and I cannot stop showering/bathing. I feel violated (I am a victim of rape about 7 years ago and I think this is also playing a part in how bad I am feeling after this). I feel sick. I am spinning out.
Overall he is a nice person and he can be very loving. He is messy, I have asked him to clean up more, but he really doesn’t feel much of his living space as dirty/messy. He has apologized and said he will wash them. I asked him how he would feel if the situation was reversed and he said it wouldn’t have bothered him. THAT BOTHERS ME TOO. A LOT. I am struggling today and I can’t concentrate. This all went down Saturday night. I have asked for some space since then because I am just so upset. Please help me. I am just bouncing from panic attacks to deep depression. I took a long break from dating before this and moved to a new state and having this happen right out of the gate is just ruining me. I feel like vomiting.