I’m in a wildly demanding career (entertainment). I often work 80 hour weeks on different shows and projects. In my 20s, I loved it.
In my 30s, I still love it, but I find that:
– Fellows are secretly or not so secretly jealous of my career and are frustrated artists. They pitch me projects on dates and phone calls.
– Fellows with demanding or non-creative careers see my job and career choice as an unstable gamble (which ya know, it can be, COVID, dual strikes, protracted contraction haven’t helped). It is not a gamble when you get that fat script fee though 🤑
Has anyone changed careers to be more available/“stable” for relationships/dating? Stability is, apparently, wildly attractive and necessary for a relationship to thrive.
My field gives more than it takes. The Hollywood stories are true… and so many untold horrors you have to swallow to keep yourself employable. I’ve also tried dating in my industry, with varying levels of success. No woman can compete with the ego of male screenwriter or director. 🙃
I’ve been a teary mess 😭 about this: both leaving entertainment to be a stable 9-5er (or at least not an 9a -1a-er). While also having my own America Ferrera Barbie moment: *it’s impossible to be loved and happy-enough and successful as a woman writer.* I feel like I have to choose career vs. future relationships.
Female lawyers, doctors, execs can outsource mom-ing and wife-ing to nannies or household help. As a woman writer, creating and being productive creatively is time spent away from the expected domestic labor/balance in a partnership.
TL;DR: Gonna Turn into Little Edie with my cat OR retire creative/career goals for a tidy lil’ life.