I (34F) was best friends with a man named John (30M) for 3 years. We both found eachother very attractive but never crossed that line. John starts dating a coworker named Ashley (33F) on a different shift and never makes it official. John has no children and has made it very clear that he wants none…while Ashley has 3 small children from previous relationships. Needless to say they had a very toxic on and off again “situationship” and stopped talking about 8 months ago. He told me that she had constantly asked him if there was something going on between us and he was insistent that nothing did. Which he didn’t lie about AT THE TIME.
She finds out during one of their “‘breaks” that he had another coworker over at his house. She is drunk when she finds this out and goes absolutely crazy (let me point out again that they are NOT and have never been “official”) She drives to his house and starts screaming at him and telling him super ugly things and just having the hugest meltdown over it. He insists that the coworker just came over to hang out. The situation ends by him kicking her out of the house and them not talking for a while.
I start sleeping with John a couple months after this and I have always had feelings for him admittedly. We end up sleeping with each other a few times a week for about 5 months straight. This is until I see him talking to Ashley again when she comes into our shift to do overtime. I get upset but I say nothing. Fast forward a couple weeks and I am on my way to his house and he calls me to cancel because something came up. I drive by his house on a hunch the next day and see her car there. I was beyond upset but said nothing until a few days later. He apologized to me and I accepted that apology like a dumbass and start sleeping with him again. I then realize a few weeks later that he is just sleeping with both of us at the same time and I finally call it off.
Fast forward a month and Ashley gets moved to our shift and he is attached to her at the hip. She brings him food every single day and he goes to all breaks with her in her car. He starts talking to me (someone who used to be his best friend) less and less each week until he only nods at me when he passes by. I feel absolutely betrayed.
I know she would absolutely flip her lid if she knew he slept with me, ESPECIALLY if she knew that I have proof that he was sleeping with both of us at the same time. I’m the person he told her “not to worry about”. Should I tell her?
TLDR: Ashley and John have had a toxic situationship for over a year. During one of their “breaks” he starts sleeping with me, the person he told her not to worry about. He continued to sleep with me and her at the same time until I found out and stopped it. She does NOT like me, should I tell her?