For as long as I remember whenever I’m around people I tend to act “erratic” I say weird things, do things for no reason, and tend to take most things as a joke. I do this alot at work and when I finish my shift I just get in my car and get this uneasy sinking feeling, I even cry sometimes when that feeling gets really bad.
Today was kind of a wake up call to all of this when me and a coworker were working the late shift and he said to me if he “pushed me too far” the other day. I said I have no clue what he’s talking about but basically I got mad as a joke the other day because I thought it was funny. He told me that another coworker came up to him and was concerned that I was in a really bad mood. I explained to him that I was just joking around and he told me that “it’s hard to tell sometimes because your so good at acting”
I feel awful about all of this and I have tried in the past to not act like this but it’s hard to do especially when everyone assumes somethings wrong with me when I don’t act this way.
Basically, I have no idea why I do this or what to do about it. Anyone ever experienced this before?