Hi! First of all, I hope this text is comprehensible since english is not my first language and I’ve never been the type to ask for help with these kinds of issues.
I’m a 22 year 2D artist,programmer and entertainer (as in, youtube tiktok this kind of stuff). When it comes to “getting good” on the art area, for many years I adopted a solitude persona, as if I could only improve and focus myself if I was completely alone, kind of a “punishing” for not being good enough, yes it’s weird, yes it doesn’t make ANY sense whatsoever but it happened. So, for about 3-4 years I’ve AVOIDED making friends since I thought it was going to steal my attention and I wouldn’t get better with my skills, while in a way I was correct this also caused me to have like zero ideas on how to approach people via the internet, I’ll share some of my experience below.
Once, a girl contacted me and invited me to her personal discord server because I looked nice and she was looking for friends, this looks like the perfect setup for getting to know people and maybe make some friends. I’m a cautious person so I went through her profile and while she was nice, ALL she talked about was sex, and I MEAN it. It’s not my problem, she can do whatever the hell she want, but it wasn’t the kind of relationship I was looking for so I just never really joined her discord server… Now, was I wrong? And please tell me if I was because this kind of thing happens far too often with me, I’ll meet someone, and not too long after I find out that person is either clinically insane or doesn’t take life seriously (don’t study, don’t have/want a job, have no ambitions)…
Once again, that’s fine, people are free to do whatever and that’s really cool, but I want to make friends that want to have a carreer, that want to improve themselves, this kind of thing.
I’m also not looking for these “work while they sleep” kind of mentality, I do like playing videogames and I ocasionally watch TV Shows and movies, we are humans, life is supposed to be good and I don’t think we need to get rid of the stuff that makes us happy, so while I believe I sound like those youtubers that make videos about “you GOTTA suffer in your 20s to have a happy life”, I’m not extreme like that haha
This is the moment I say that I HOPE TO GOD I am not sounding extremely annoying, or disrespectful as I would never try to offend or harm anyone.
Essentially I’m completely LOST right now. How do I even make friends? My hobbies are watching movies and playing videogames (tho I unfortunately only play single player ones), I don’t think discord servers work for me because most of the time they feel like advertisement for youtubers or streamers or people over there fit into the “clinically insane” category.
Is anyone on the same situation? If so, what did you do/are doing to solve it? Thanks for reading and I hope I was comprehensible 🙂