Girlfriend quit her job a few months ago and wants to study. I am working 1hr+ away. She wants us to move out, and her university would be 2hrs away from where I would need to live (with my family). I can’t pay bills on my own so I feel she is forcing me to change my living situation, even though I always try to make a compromise on living so we can be together.
I feel like the relationship will dwindle if she moves so far away, because I have a full-time job and she wants to “create new connections”, which I completely understand and sympathize with, but it feels like she does not care for “us” at all, and is simply making a choice that overrules my feelings. On the other hand, I am unsure if I am overreacting and overthinking, which is clouding my judgement. I am stressing too much about this situation as I feel unfairly treated from having put “us” first while she is now putting “herself” first and leaves me no choice but to move home with my family (which I do not really want to).
I have expressed to her that I feel this situation is unfair to me, and she acknowledged it, but it didn’t seem to make her rethink the choice at all. There are multiple universities she could go to with (relatively) similar degress, but she wants the one farthest away from where I would be living. I believe am also stressing out because of a previous long-distance relationship where I was unfairly treated, and told myself back then that long-distance was not sosmething I would do again but now it seems like it is being forced on me (I know 2hrs isn’t VERY long distance).
She says moving away from each other is only temporarily, but at the same time she is doing a degree that spans multiple years and does not seem interested in living away from that city – meaning I would have to travel even further to get to my day to day job.
I don’t want to let insecurities take over me, but at the same I’m conflicted as to where to draw the line on what I want as well.
TLDR: GF wants to move out to study in a town 2hrs away. I cant pay current bills alone, which means I have to move home. I don’t want this, but I have no choice. Questioning our relationship.