I’m 27 F in a newer relationship (6 months). He’s a great guy, treats me well, I love him and I enjoy having sex with him. Issue is, it’s hard for me to orgasm. Usually I end up doing it myself at the end but it’s not as easy as it used to be. While it’s usually been a challenge for men to make me orgasm, it’s usually been relatively easy for me to do it myself. I also did have one ex partner that would consistently make me orgasm multiple times but no one has been able to do that since. I don’t know if it’s gotten harder with age, but it seems like things aren’t like they used to be. My bf recently made me orgasm from head for the first time but it was very hard to get there. Even though he doesn’t make me feel bad when I don’t orgasm or seem to care a great deal, I still feel bad when he tries and I don’t orgasm. I also wonder why it just feels harder in general and wonder what’s wrong with me. I want to try to find a way to make it easier but I don’t know what to do.
Things that I think are getting in the way:
– Aside from the rare time I pretty much have to orgasm with my legs tensed and completely straight. It helps tighten all the muscles. This makes most positions impossible to orgasm in.
– I have never came from penetrative sex because I can’t contact fully with something inside of me. I have actually had orgasms a couple times in the past right as my partner pulled out.
– My mind wanders a lot. It is difficult for me to focus and I sometimes think of random things
– I don’t feel like I get super turned on unless I watch porn. I never used to watch a lot, but about a year ago I stopped completely because I thought maybe that was contributing to me not being able to orgasm.
– My bf doesn’t last super long during sex. Sometimes in the past I feel like the longer sex would help prime me for an orgasm.
Sorry I know this was a lot. I would appreciate any advice you have!!