We’ve been together since college, she’s the woman I love the most, a great woman, and the mother of our children.
But since she went into menopause (She goes to the gynecologist) her sex drive has been shutted down, we went from having a very active sex life to only having intimacy once every week and then once every few months.
I don’t really have a problem with it, do I enjoy being with my wife? yes, but I have my own hands if she doesn’t feel like doing anything.
We were fine with this, I just enjoy being with her cuddling, watching movies, kissing her cheeks, I’m getting old too after all, I just want to be laying with her in peace.
Like I said, we were fine with this until a few months ago when she started to feel insecure about this, she insisted for a few weeks on doing me “favors” if I felt ‘the need’ even though she didn’t wanted to do anything but I got upset and told her to not treat herself likea and that I don’t want to do anything if she doesn’t wants that too, after that, she stopped insisting on those things.
Until a few days ago when she told me “let’s open the relationship” I was really scared, I thought I was the problem but she told me that it has been months since we had Intimacy for the last time and she is afraid that I will cheat on her and leave her for some woman so she prefers to open the relationship and like that I can “satisfy my needs” the problem is that I have no needs to satisfy, I mean, I’m an human, obviously I feel desire but I just go to the bathroom and think about her, that’s all. I’m not an animal
I told her I don’t want to open the relationship at all, she insisted that we could open it just from just my side if I was afraid that she would be with another man and I told her NO, I don’t want to be with other women but she just doesn’t believe me. We were really good with this before, I don’t know if anyone has put ideas in her head but I hate that she feels that way and I also hate that she thinks I’m that kind of man.
I really don’t know what to do to let her know that I don’t need to have intimacy and I just want to be with her. Our kids are older now so I just wanted to be with her chilling in home together even if she doesn’t want to have anything sexual.
How can i make her understand?