Hi, I’ve never posted on here before so forgive me if i press anything wrong or something. I 22(F) have never had a boyfriend. I’ve had a few opportunities in the past (e.g. at school, through dating apps) but nothing ever came of it. At the moment I’ve been on one date with a guy I met online and it went well, we should be seeing each other again soon.
Here’s the problem.
Since I was probably 14, I’ve always panicked at the thought of dating anyone. I think I had ‘crushes’ (or might’ve told myself I liked them but not really) but 2 times I can think of my ‘crush’ has liked me back and asked me out but I just immediately feel this drop in my stomach and feel panicky. I don’t know why. I’ve been on dates recently and can’t get past the second date because I start feeling panicked, and I don’t know why because most of the guys are great. Despite the guy I saw recently being my type and us getting along well, I’ve already started feeling dread toward seeing him again.
It’s like, I just feel panicked at the thought of being in a relationship, despite the fact I’m a bit of a hopeless romantic and desperately want to fall in love!
I know it’s probably a little bit fear of the unknown as I’ve never had a proper boyfriend (and I’m a virgin) but it feels more than that and I’m starting to think that there’s nothing wrong with me, and that I’ll never be able to date comfortably. It all gives me so much anxiety despite the guys being great.
Also, I know about attachment styles and this sounds a little like avoidant attachment, but I had a very loving and stable childhood so I don’t know why I’d be anything other than securely attached.
Advice?
Thank you🙏